Feminine Energy for Anxious Girls
Is anxiety stopping you from being a true feminine goddess?
Picture this, a moody restaurant, tea candles burning on tiny tables, music playing in the back ground. You, in that favorite green dress that makes you feel your absolute best. The man of your current affection hunched down next to you at a too small table. This has the makings of a memorable first date. Only problem, you are feeling a little more than a little anxious.
How can you still show up as your best self when anxious?
Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Body
Mindfulness
Mindfulness is an active awareness of your thoughts. We cannot stop our minds from thinking, it is the nature of mind to think. However, we can acknowledge the thoughts, let them go, and return to the present moment. By letting go of thoughts that arise you can stay actively engaged in the present. The alternative is to be engaged in thinking and not connected to your body or the present experience.
“A sour face does not come by chance; it is made by sour thoughts.””
Example: If you are ruminating on thoughts of comparison judgment or anxiety your body will reflect such negative thinking. Your thoughts will reflect in your body. A more feminine posture and movements are the byproduct of good thoughts. The joyful, playful, and wonderful thoughts which arise should be encouraged and then let them go. Let them go to return to the moment. Even thoughts of weddings and babies will take you out of your body and in your head.
Using your 5 senses.
Indulge in your senses with exaggerated awareness . Engaging with your senses in this self can be seductive.
Example: Don’t just drink your strawberry margarita. Enjoy your strawberry margarita maybe it’s so good you lick your bottom lip at the end.
There is something alluring about enjoyment.
Ask yourself how does it feel to be in my body right now?
Much of exuding feminine energy is being in your body. Body language starts with an awareness of your inner state.
Breath
“ Then the LORD God formed man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and man became a living being”
Every breath is life giving and sustaining, truly a gift from God. Don’t underestimate the power of simply bringing the unconscious into the conscious.
Try This: Make your breaths deep and long. This will slow down your heart rate and help to shut off the sympathetic or flight response activated with the feeling of anxiety.
Anxious feelings activate the part of our nervous system designed for “fight or flight”. This system keeps us safe from potential threats by preparing the body to “fight or flight”. The problem is when non threats inappropriately activate this response. For example, you’re feeling nervous about a date. Those anxious feelings activate your sympathetic nervous system leading to increase in heart rate, sweating, shallow breathing, tremors and even racing thoughts. To shut this system off and get your body into a more relaxed state start by taking deep breaths. Deep breathing tells your body, you are safe and there is no threat.
Externalize
Finally, consider externalizing the internal as a means to get out of your own head and back into the present. Externalization means expressing internal thoughts and emotions. It can take the form of verbal, written, even physical expression.
Example: telling your date you are feeling a little anxious is a form of externalization. It might seem scary at first but the benefit is that they now have the opportunity to respond in a way which may help sooth some of that anxiety.
Regardless, just the act of externalization alone will help to ease anxiety.
Use your judgement when being this level of vulnerable with someone new.
It is possible to exude feminine goddess energy even as an anxious girlie. The key is to manage the anxious feelings so that you stay present in your body. With practice and self compassion you will become her.
If you are struggling with anxiety and looking for natural drug free solutions here are my doctor supported recommendations.